5 Secrets to a better Relationship
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Looking for a relationship can be hard, but being in a relationship is even harder.
I’ve been there, I was looking and hoping to be in a relationship but little did I know being in one was even harder. So many things I didn’t know about having a happy healthy relationship. After Years and Years I finally learned what I should’ve learned long ago, which is what I’m sharing you here!
In this blog post, I’m sharing the 5 secrets I learned that allowed me to have a better relationship and keep it like that for good. I’ll be covering:
Communication
Equality
Boundaries
Rewarding
Reconnect
So if you’re struggling to keep the relationship going, constantly disagreeing and "‘making up"‘ right after, to end up falling back to where you guys started, then you’re in the right place! All of that is about to change for good!
How I Made My Relationship Better
It started off great, we both liked each other and had similar interests and life events. We were doing pretty good up until it just wasn’t the same anymore. There was a time where we wouldn’t see each other for a long time. That kind of helped us but it also didn’t fix anything.
Throughout the years it was just an ongoing situation, there were times where I thought everything was getting better but then I realized what I was doing. Moments we would argue I would just apologize and say is all my fault which was WRONG, because it made him think I was the reason for our arguments and I was still left mad. The situation didn’t get fixed, It only got worse.
After countless times of trying to find a method that would help both sides of the problem, the answer was right in our faces. we just didn’t know how to start. After all it was years and years of arguing and him thinking it was all my fault at one point.
From there on we both agreed to follow these “secrets'“ that would continue to better our relationship.
1.Communication
Yea is pretty obvious right. And I mention communication because we all know about communication and although you think your communicating pretty well with your partner…you’re not. Same goes with your partner.
Now you and I both know that you don’t tell him everything that’s on your mind and that’s the problem. See when I say everything I don’t mean the bad name calling or insult that you may be thinking of…you should also earn not to do that.
If something that he did bothered you I highly advise you to tell him right away. Don’t tell your best friend or your mom, Tell Him.
Address the issue
Tell him how it made you feel
Ask him why did he do it (His action that made you upset)
Come up with a solution
Add a warning (NOT A THREAT)
When I say warning I mean “ if you do that again after telling you how I felt, I will start to lose trust in you and our relationship will not get any better.
2. Equality
Alright ladies you read that right …equality. So if he’s constantly getting mad at something you’re doing and you have no idea why. Try putting yourself in his shoes. Picture him doing the same thing that you’re doing. Or he’s probably mad that your able to do things that he’s not able to do. We all want to feel like a free person but also respect our relationship.
OR maybe he always brings you a little gift when he comes to see you or always compliments how beautiful you are. But you don’t do the same. Guys also wants to receive those nice little gestures, they may be small but mean a lot. You should both reciprocate the same love.
3. Boundaries
There are things that bother us that other people don’t know. But it’s super important that the person we want to spend our life with should know. This is such an important thing to talk about with your partner because you don’t want to feel uncomfortable with him. It can be anything as long as you both agree and understand on why you are creating that boundary.
For example, You probably feel really uncomfortable or jealous that he is hanging out with a female friend or talking to one. You feel that way because that is something you do with him and you consider special so the fact that he’s doing it with another females makes you extremely mad, which will lead to an argument.
Setting boundaries shouldn’t worsen the relationship but understand what makes the other person uncomfortable and respecting the person you love while keeping your relationship in tact. So don’t be afraid of “restricting them” because that’s not what you’re doing.
4. Coming up with a solution
When you both are arguing and want to end it. The perfect thing to do is to talk about how you both feel. Make sure to take turns and let them speak and likewise. After you are done with that, what you both need to is to come up with answer on how to solve the problem and what you guys will do so that it won’t happen again. Is SUPER IMPORTANT that the solution you guys come up with will make you BOTH happy. It should NEVER EVER be one sided. You are NOT trying to please just him and he is not just trying to just please you .This is why is called a Relationship!!
5. Reconnect
Whether you are living with him or not, you both have a job and responsibilities that you both take care of . You might be around him all day but you’re not exactly spending quality time. So depending on what you both are into, make sure to plan a date with just two of you. It can be
Going to the movies
Movie at home
Watching Favorite show
Cooking/Baking something together
Having a bubble bath
Going for a walk
Bike riding
Having a romantic dance
Exploring a new place together
It can be absolutely anything, just make sure to reconnect with each other and spend some quality time. Now this is what helped me the most with my partner.